I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
