can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
