do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
