its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize