But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
