I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
