Don't you send me to vm
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
