So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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