1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
