She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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