Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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