Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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