You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I smell stomach acid.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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