Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Randomize
