I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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