Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
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