508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
