i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
