honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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