trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
