i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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