Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
