I hate your face
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
