I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
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