he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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