No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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