You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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