PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
We need to get me chipped asap
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
