You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
