Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
