just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
