And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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