If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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