you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
