Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
