Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
