I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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