i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
