yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
