Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
