What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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