Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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