ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
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