I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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