If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
