I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
