He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
How does it feel to date your dad?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
