I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize