i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
