you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Randomize
